Therapy for Anxiety & Overthinking

The meeting ended hours ago. Part of you is still in it.

I work with adults who think things through more than anyone asked them to: the conversation replayed on the drive home, the text read four times before sending, the plan with a backup behind it. It’s exhausting, and it often feels like the responsible thing to do. This is individual therapy, so we start with how your mind works, and where it has stopped working for you.

Photo A · Hero · 12:5

The late shift

Drafting the better answer an hour after the conversation ended.
Reading a one-line reply for tone, then reading it again.
Making a decision, then spending the evening reopening it.
Lying awake rehearsing tomorrow, in order, with contingencies.

Why it’s hard to put down

Thinking ahead is a real skill, and for many people it paid off: the prepared one doesn’t get caught out. Sometimes it started early, and sometimes it was simply rewarded again and again. Either way, the habit can outlast the need.

A few ways it can go, not a description of everyone.
Then	Now
Noticing trouble early kept things from getting worse.	You scan every plan for what could go wrong, and feel irresponsible when you stop.
Being caught off guard once was enough to learn from.	Every meeting, trip, and hard conversation gets rehearsed in advance, just in case.
Getting it wrong once cost more than checking ever did.	Even a small decision waits on one more review, one more opinion, one more piece of information.

Photo B · Interlude · 4:5

Some problems are solved by thinking. Others just get rehearsed.

The bargain

If I think it through first, nothing can catch me off guard.
If I keep watching, I’ll see it coming.
If I replay it enough, I’ll find the mistake before anyone else does.

It isn’t an unreasonable deal, and sometimes it pays. The trouble is the terms: there is always one more thing to check, so the work never counts as finished. I’m not interested in arguing anyone out of the deal. I’m more interested in what it’s costing, and what you’d do with the hours back.

More than “just stop worrying”

You’ve probably been told to stop worrying. I’d like to be more useful than that.

The work is collaborative: you know your mind better than I do, and I can help you see what it’s doing. We pay attention to when the thinking starts, what it’s trying to protect, and what happens when you let a decision stand.

Part of the work is telling a problem worth solving from one that’s only being rehearsed. I’m also interested in what changes between sessions: a decision that stays made, a message sent without a second draft.

Evenings that end when the day does

You may notice, over time, that:

You make a decision and let it stand, without checking it twice.
You can leave a question unanswered without spending the rest of the day trying to solve it.
You can sit with not knowing yet, and the evening stays yours.
A conversation ends when it ends, not three hours later.

Thinking will still be useful. It just won’t need to work nights.

Where this tends to connect

Relationship Issues
If the worry mostly lives in your relationships, in the re-reading and the wondering what they meant.
Trauma
If the watchfulness has been there for as long as you can remember.

If you’ve been turning it over for long enough, write to me.

Get in Touch

Sessions are online for clients in New Jersey, North Carolina, Georgia, South Carolina, and Virginia, as well as eligible clients in Florida through my registered telehealth provider status. I provide therapy in English and Spanish. Questions about cost are covered on Rates & Insurance, and other practical questions on the FAQ.